Fin de sièckening

You probably saw the Browns lose to the Dolphins in their 2013 season opener. You probably have some opinions on it too. So if you need to, look elsewhere for your recaps and rants. What you find here will probably be quirky, disjointed, and of moderate significance only.

1. The Browns allowed only 20 yards rushing, which ties for the second fewest in team history. You’d have to go back nearly 59 years to find a stingier game for the Browns’ rush defense.

2. Kicker Billy Cundiff became the first true “sandwich” player of the new Browns era. That is, he appeared in a regular season game for Cleveland both before and after appearing for another team or teams. The most recent sandwich players were those who spanned both the new and old Browns franchises: Jerry Ball, Orlando Brown, and Antonio Langham. The best sandwich Brown was, of course, Paul Warfield, who was honored at today’s game between his two NFL teams.

3. It was Oniel Cousins’ first career start at guard, and it left a stench. Consider carefully the correlation between the new Browns’ astounding personnel turnover at quarterback and at the two guard positions. Today saw the 37th different player* to start at guard since 1999. Could Garrett Gilkey become the 38th next Sunday?

* for the record: Jim Pyne, Scott Rehberg, Orlando Bobo, Jim Bundren, Steve Zahursky, Everett Lindsay, Ross Verba, Shaun O’Hara, Tre Johnson, Jeremy McKinney, Brad Bedell, Barry Stokes, Melvin Fowler, Chad Beasley, Enoch DeMar, Paul Zukauskas, Kelvin Garmon, Damian Cook, Joaquin Gonzalez, Joe Andruzzi, Cosey Coleman, Mike Pucillo, Dave Yovanovits, Lennie Friedman, Rob Smith, Eric Steinbach, Seth McKinney, Ryan Tucker, Rex Hadnot, Floyd Womack, Hank Fraley, Shaun Lauvao, Billy Yates, Jason Pinkston, John Greco, Oniel Cousins.

4. Cousins’ four penalties included a holding call that nullified a touchdown, an opening day tradition of sorts. Remember the first play from scrimmage of 2006? Kevin Shaffer’s holding call wiped out a 74-yard bomb from Charlie Frye to Braylon Edwards. Frye failed to complete another pass longer than 18 yards, and the Browns lost to the Saints, 19-14.

5. The last time the Browns scored fewer than ten points in a game was Week 8 of last season, when they beat Norv Turner’s Chargers, 7-6. That was also the last time (until today) that Brandon Weeden completed fewer than half his passes.

6. Weeden became the fourth QB to start consecutive opening games for the new Browns (Couch, Holcomb, Frye). Ominous note: there’s yet to be a three-peat since the days of Bernie Kosar a full generation ago.

7. Weeden has thrown 7 interceptions in his two opening day starts — four against the Eagles last year and three today. None of his other games have seen him picked off more than twice.

8. The Dolphins converted half the time on third down, seemingly all on passes right up the middle with space to spare. The Browns were 1-for-14 on third down, mainly due to atrocious pass protection schemes and execution. (OK, that was borderline ranting there.)
 
9. Game balls: TE Jordan Cameron (9 rec., 108 yards, 1 TD), DE Desmond Bryant (2 sacks), P Spencer Lanning (43.6 net ave., 2 inside 20).

10. Goats: WR Josh Gordon (suspended), RG Oniel Cousins, WR Greg Little (10 targets, 4 rec., 26 yards)